


The Snack Slip

by Enraged_Erin



Series: Eternal Souls [3]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-14 03:03:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16904898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Enraged_Erin/pseuds/Enraged_Erin
Summary: A normal day that you want to turn into a lazy day almost never goes the way you plan, does it?





	The Snack Slip

**Author's Note:**

> This is a quick little fic based off of a pre-recording flub-up I let off just before starting the second episode of my let's play of Undertale (Genocide Route). Needless to say... 3 years later, I still haven't lived this down. May as well put it in writing.

 

                It was a beautiful day outside. The birds were singing, and the flowers were blooming. But on days like these, Zerrus really didn’t want to be bothered by anything and just wanted to stay in bed. Cracking open one of her blood red eyes, she scanned her surroundings like she did every morning. Ever since the attack by the Gloam across the Sacred Grove, she has needed to be alert for any more signs of dark energy that synchronized with the Gloam energy. When she detected nothing, she huffed and pulled the covers closer to her chin.

                The sound of her door opening caused her to scrunch her face up in annoyance, burying herself further under her blanket until the party left. She hoped that whoever the party was that had entered her room would see that she wanted to sleep and would just turn around and leave. When the shuffling of footsteps drew closer to her bed, she simply stayed tucked under the soft blanket with only a smidge of her blue hair poking out from the top. The shuffling stopped just in front of her bed, Zerrus stayed still.

                That was until a soft weight pressed against her butt.

                Jolting upright with her left eye ablaze with magic and a dark scowl on her lips, she glared heatedly forward. When she saw the culprit, her gaze softened, and the magic fire died out. It was just her cat, Jasmine. But standing next to the bed and smiling at her was Sans, his trademark grin growing slightly at her reaction to Jasmine slowly curling up on her lap. “heya.”

                “Meh…” Zerrus responded back, slowly petting Jasmine’s silky fur.

                “what’s the matter? cat got your tongue?” She stilled in her rhythmic petting and glanced up at Sans, his shoulders shaking slightly as he suppressed a giggle. “c’mon. you know that was a good one.”

                Heaving a sigh, Zerrus picked Jasmine off her lap and placed her down beside her so she could swing her legs over to the side of the bed. “Okay. You got me. It WAS a good one. But don’t tell me you only came in here with Jasmine just to tell a pun?”

                “nah. she followed me in here and jumped on you herself.” He explained, picking up Jasmine from the bed and scratching behind her ears. Hopping down off the bed, she stretched until a loud pop sounded. Rubbing at her eyes, she yawned silently until she glanced up and saw the blank eye sockets on Sans’s face. “please don’t do that.”

                “Eh…” Zerrus replied, shuffling out of the bedroom with Jasmine following just behind her. As she walked downstairs, she noticed Red lazing about on the couch. Passing him a slight wave as she made her way to the kitchen, she stumbled slightly as the black cat weaved her way between her legs. “Come on now, you furry little noodle. Don’t trip me.” The cat looked up and meowed loudly at Zerrus, her face falling slightly at the ridiculousness of being sassed by a cat. “What? You hungry or something?”

                “why are ya talkin’ to that thing like it can understand ya? it’s just a cat. not like it’s very sma- HEY!” Red began to say when Jasmine sprinted over to the red skeleton on the couch and latched around his leg and sunk her tiny fangs into his ankle. “WHAT THE FUCK, YA LITTLE SHIT?!”

                “Heh. She’s not THAT stupid, Red. She does stupid things.” Zerrus laughed grabbing a pack of cherry poptarts and a can of root beer. She sat down at the dining room table, across from Lust and began struggling to open the pack. When she successfully managed to open the pack, one of the poptarts crumbled apart on the table top. “Uuueeaaagh… dammit.” She pinched the bridge of her nose as she stood up to grab a napkin and started to clean up the mess.

                Lust chuckled under his breath and winked over at Zerrus. She grumbled slightly as she took a bite of her remaining poptart. “hey kid… wanna buy a poptart?” Lust teased.

                “Hell no, you ain’t poppin’ my tart.”

                …

                Silence hung in the air around them as the weight of her words hit her full on in the face. She casually bit into her poptart, hoping that Lust didn’t notice what she said. She tried to sneak a look at his face, to gauge his reaction to her Freudian Slip. His eyelights were missing, a purple blush was blooming on his cheekbones, and his grin was almost a straight line across his face. Upon noticing his facial reaction, she choked on her poptart and smacked her chest a few times to dislodge it. When she finally managed to catch her breath, Lust’s eyelights had finally reappeared into his sockets and he was grinning from one side of his face to the other. She could swear that his eyes were glinting a bit brighter than usual.

                “what did you just say?” Lust prodded, leaning forward on his arms and slowly closing the gap between them.

                “Nothin’.” Zerrus responded, casually taking a drink from her root beer in hopes that Lust would just drop it.

                “but you said-“

                “what? did zerrus say something?” Sans inquired as he and Red stepped into the kitchen. Zerrus casually wiped up the remains of the poptart crumbs she had choked on and threw away the empty pack.

                “I didn’t say shit.” She answered back as she grabbed her soda and began walking towards her office.

                “clearly ya did if yer makin’ a face like that, doll.” Red pointed out as he chuckled darkly at her attempt to brush her little slip up away. “what’d ya say?”

                “she said-“ Lust started to answer.

                “No.” she warned with a glance over her shoulder.

                “-hell no-“

                “NO.” An unkept energy started to build and crackle in the air around her, her short hair standing up from the static charge.

                “-you ain’t poppin’ my tart.”

                “Hrk!” Zerrus stilled, the can in her hand crushed by the sheer force of her clenching her fist. The carbonated drink dripped out around the dented opening and onto the floor. The sound of Red wheezing and keeling over with a deep rumbling belly laugh sounding like thunder in her ears. Sans was doing his best to suppress his laughter from she could hear.

                “no fuckin’ way! zerrus?! our timid, cat loving, soulmate?! no fuckin’ chance she said somethin’ like that!” Red cackled, standing up and wiping a tear from his eye socket as he turned to look at Zerrus, still frozen in place with a crushed and dripping can of soda in her hand. “yup. she did!” He burst out laughing again, a low growl rumbling deep in the back of her throat.

                “If you don’t shut up right now… you’re gonna regret it.” Zerrus warned, her eye glinting slightly as she turned fully to face Red. He stopped laughing at that exact moment, his eyelights focusing on her and his grin hitching higher.

                “alright.” Red shrugged, turning his back to her and eyeing the discarded wrapper of the poptarts she had just eaten. Printed clearly on the packaging was multiple images of cherries. Shaking his head and storing that information in the back of his mind, he strolled over towards the cabinet and grabbed another packet of poptarts, sticking them in his pocket and grinning to himself. He turned to face Sans and Lust once he heard Zerrus’s office door click shut. He held up the pack of poptarts. “what do ya say we tease her a bit? not every day she says somethin’ golden like that. gotta let it count.”

                “red, unless you want her to chain you up and kick the absolute shit out of you, i wouldn’t press it any further than we already did.” Sans warned, drinking his coffee and sitting down at the table.

                “what? ya done this before or somethin’?”

                “nah. but she’s definitely got the ability.”

                Several hours later, Zerrus was casually rolling back and forth between the displays in her office and wrote down important notes on her clipboard. Each display was charted to a specific magic level in the Sacred Grove, ranging from the natural healing effects in the water to the more mundane magic effects such as the pyrelights. A knock on her door jarred her from her readings. Setting the clipboard down in her lap and taking her glasses off her face, she rolled back over to the main desk. “Yeah?” she called out, signifying that the person who knocked can enter or simply tell her to come out for dinner. When she went into her office, nobody bothered her considering the importance of her job. It was more of a silent agreement to never enter her office without verbal response.

                The door opened slowly, Red stepping in and looking around her office briefly with his red eyelights. “impressive shit ya got in here.” Red remarked, stepping towards one of the displays showing a line graph. “do ya really understand what all this means?”

                “Do you really think Queen Valerian would leave this task to me if I didn’t understand what these charts meant?” Zerrus deadpanned, still typing in the results she had written down on the clipboard into the computer. “What is it, Red?” She didn’t even bother to glance at him, she already recognized how he spoke and his gruff voice and could identify him at the drop of a hat.

                “just thought i’d be nice and bring ya a snack.” He reached into his pocket and fished out the aluminum packet and tossed it towards her. “catch.”

                Turning her chair slightly, she snatched the airborne snack and placed it on her leg. “Thanks. How’d you know I was-“ She stilled when she caught the light bouncing off the aluminum wrapping. Glancing down at the snack Red had tossed to her, she sucked in a sharp breath. “UGEEEEEEHK!” A pair of chains lashed out at Red at the sound of her shriek, wrapping around his ribcage and slamming him against the wall.

                “w-what’s the matter, doll? seeing red?” Red sweat dripped down his skull. He could faintly make out the sound of her soul’s musical signature, the rhythm specific to her and her alone. He knew right there that he had crossed the line by pressing her with the poptart. “c’mon now. n-no need ta get all bent outta shape.”

                “…” She merely glared at him, the poptart long forgotten on the floor and her chains tightening ever so slightly against him. The tell-tale sound of someone teleporting into her office drew her attention for only a brief second, but her chains remained looped around Red.

                “what the hell was that sound?!” Sans shouted, looking around the office before his eyelights fell on to Red’s chained form against the wall and Zerrus’s ‘I’m-going-to-maim-you’ look on her face. “that came outta you?” She only glanced at him for a second to answer his question before returning to stare at Red. “damn, kid. i might be a monster but that sound you made was by far the most monstrous thing i’ve ever heard.”

                “Blame the fuckin’ poptart.” She snarled out, moving to step out of her office and leaving Red chained to the wall.

                “h-hey! ya ain’t gonna leave me here, are ya?!” Red called out to her in the hallway.

                “Yep!”

                The sound of the front door opening, and closing followed shortly after. Red shifted against the chains to loosen their hold but found that they didn’t budge in the slightest. He looked up towards Sans, who seemed more interested in the data on the screens than the skeleton chained up to the office wall. “you... uh… just gonna stand there?”

                “i warned you.” Sans replied, picking up the clipboard and writing new information down.

                “hey, she baited herself for some teasin’ with that innuendo!” Red tried to defend.

                “it may have been a funny one, but it’s clear which one of us has the biggest balls around here.” Lust commented from the doorway. “don’t poke the zer-bear.”

                “the fuck’s that supposed ta mean?!” Red growled as he tried to lurch in the direction of Lust’s voice.

                “you’re lucky she let you off with just this. and some possible hearing damage from that shriek…” Sans remarked with a shake of his head and a shudder. “i did not know she could hit that high of a decibel.”

                “yer tellin’ me.” Red shifted against the chains a bit, trying to get comfortable. “so, when d’ya think she’s gonna be back?”

                “probably gonna be a couple of hours based on these readings. i think you gave her the perfect excuse to get out of the house.”

                “a couple of hours?!”


End file.
